A Closer Look at Open Adoptions

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Choosing the right type of adoption is just as important as the choice of adoption itself. This is a lifelong choice that affects all parties involved. A birthmother’s choice for an open, closed or hybrid (semi- open) adoption will impact her, her child and the adoptive parents. It is important to understand the ins and outs of each adoption type and what that looks like for everyone during pregnancy, delivery and postpartum. Let’s take a closer look at an open adoption.

An “open adoption” is an adoption in which the birth mother and adoptive parents commit to a relationship in which identifying information is shared and communication is possible without an adoption professional.

What does an Open Adoption look like for Birthmothers?

For birthmothers an open adoption can provide peace of mind knowing that they can still be involved and part of their child’s life. The amount of post adoption contact and involvement is determined by the birthmother and the adoptive parents in advance.

Pros:

– Ability to be in their child’s life

– Ability to be in their child’s life

– Wider circle of family and support

– Transparency with their child (i.e. why adoption was chosen)

– Eased fear that they made the right decision

Considerations:

– Possible boundary issues

– Unrealistic expectations from adoptive parents

– Conflicting values

What does an Open Adoption look like for Adoptive Parents?

Adoptive parents can also benefit from an open adoption agreement. Participating in an open adoption can bring adoptive parents comfort knowing the birthmother’s wishes and ease their fears over the birth mother changing her mind later on.

Pros:

– Can provide answers to their child’s questions

– Eased fears over birthmother changing her mind

– Wider circle of family and support

– Transparency with their child

Considerations:

– Possible boundary issues

– Unrealistic expectations from birthmother

– Conflicting values

What does an Open Adoption look like for Adoptive Children?

Many adoptees have a feeling of a “missing piece”, wanting to know more about who they are and where they came from. With an open adoption, the adoptee is spared this feeling. They have access to their background, heritage, medical records and any other information the birth mother is willing to provide.

Pros:

– Answers to many questions

– Link to heritage and ancestry

– Wider circle of family and support

– Access to medical information

– No need to search for biological parent

Considerations:

– Possible feeling of having to choose (i.e. can they love both parents equally)

Studies have shown that open adoptions are beneficial for all parties involved. This setup allows the birth mother to connect with her child and discuss why she chose adoption for them. This can bring peace and closure to them both. Having this link between birth mother, child and adoptive parents is a lifelong commitment, make sure you choose the adoption type that is right for you.

Understanding the differences in adoption options and deciding what’s best for you can be stressful, but the team at A Birthmother’s Choice is here to offer support and resources to help you understand and exercise your adoption rights every step of the way.

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